Category Archives: plymouth state university

Top Heavy by Ambien Grace

Posted on by Standard Respond
...look Ambien, there's a whale!

…look Ambien, there’s a whale!

"A Kodak Camera advertisement appeared in...

“A Kodak Camera advertisement appeared in the first issue of The Photographic Herald and Amateur Sportsman, November, 1889. The slogan “You press the button, we do the rest” summed up George Eastman’s ground breaking snapshot camera system.” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Thinking about times when you pass out in the bathtub of a public bathroom in a dorm housing hundreds of strangers?
Me too! Ambien Grace-land is a perfect example of not mixing Oxy, Ambien and naturally organic from birth…stupidity.
It’s right up there with the proud as a peacock strut I encompassed after I checked the dipstick under Grandpa Ed’s Malibu hood. So proud was I that I had taught myself how to change my car’s oil! So proud was I that the check engine light could mean nothing when on if I just wished it away…
Mum Theresa and Father Floyd are always so enchanted by my accomplishments. So Kodak moment are they that even in mixed company they tend not to bring them up. Whilst under the watchful eye’s of the UNH proud professors during the Christmas Why Do We Have to Get Together, parties…Mum prefers to keep my squandered attempts at adulthood to herself. She’s good like that! Not wanting other parents to feel poorly about their honor roll grads, their off to get mastered at something or another children.
I wonder what will become of my ‘photography’ and my ‘bachelor’s of not so fine art’ degree?
Not much! Stupid is as stupid does. Thank goodness the government saw fit to put me to work with the other mixed but not stirred up real well rich kids trying to feel ‘poor.’
I had chance to glance back at a diary entry and shit, it disturbed me and wiped that proud stamp right off my ass like the blistering sore it is.
Sept 28th 2012-
“i wanted to go to UCLA but they require those stupid test results that i failed miserably…I don’t test well. Stupid is something I’ll never outgrow!  I have to Google everything and I know that’s cheating…but it isn’t if I don’t tell anybody”

I really don’t know about this whole philosophy of ‘ you have two ears and only one mouth so you can listen twice as much as you can speak’…Shit like that makes me want to drink, find my knife, cry, pill up and go to sleep!
Again, I ask, what the fuck does vast as the sea and deep as you can be mean? What the hell are bedroom eyes? And, for Christ sakes why is it I break out with scented tampons?
Those are my NOT accomplishments.

The Senior Corps logo

The Senior Corps logo (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I will be Ambien the Annie C., who lives at home with closeted parents and their pampered dumbed down pedigree, Beckett Couvillion the third until I volunteer for Senior Corps.
This is what I have to say to all those not well intentioned wise twenty-something’s out there who do happen to know their dipstick from their gearbox:
Ducks can fly backwards, the grass is green because it’s pretty and what good did it do any of us to understand E= MC Hammer Squared!

Oh, yeah, by the way, those of us poached out to AmeriCorps only get there by route of being denied everywhere else.  Take that and shove it where the smart ass don’t shine!

Paper Thin

Posted on by Standard 1

I don’t know exactly where or when it happened. Don’t really care? Of course, I do. AA meetings have always had a Stepford feel to me. Something beaten down into our souls. So far in grained that the recourse, production and aesthics of it all are similar to a faded water-color painting.

You don't need drugs to show you heaven, baby 'cause there's plenty clean in hell

You don’t need drugs to show you heaven, baby
’cause there’s plenty clean in hell

How does one get over the hump? How do you focus on something that is the same something as the something before.

For instance, today, I went to my home group. Like the good recovering alcoholic/addict I am. I listened not intently to Jim babble about the existentialism in his recovery. Jeanie complained about her constant struggle with a higher power, even after 35 years. Suzie reread from the Came to Believe book. Re-emphasizing the same verbage we just heard. And, finally, Roy coughed, spat, picked at his nose and pulled out a nasty example of a snot rag to dispose of item once lodged in his over the top broken blood vessel nose.

Focus Ruth! That’s what I kept telling myself. Keep your eye on the ball! Don’t let up or it will all go down!

So, an hour after saying my usual assault of verbal AA redundant diarrhea and listening to others with the same affliction; I felt better. I felt good.

Dare I say what has been said before me? Keep coming back, fake it ’til you make it!

These are Ambien dosed alcoholics that are laced with an Oxy dependency.  They have found volunteer work with the government.  There  are the spoiled middle aged men that drive horribly reproduced sport cars on inheritance bestowed upon them by Mommy and Daddy.  There is of course, the twenty-something’s trying against all odds to free them selves from the trailer and it’s trash.  Usually these kids look like deer stuck in headlights.

My heart goes out to anyone who has battled a bias of some sort from the day of their conception forward.  The inspiration in that there is no reliance on anyone but themselves…lifts me up.  I have been there.  Hiding from the emotional abuse.  Wanting so badly for a beating instead of the constant threat of one.  Drinking myself into another dimension and passing out and coming to.

I drank on a regular basis; a half a gallon of Vodka (cheaper the better), a twelve pack of beer (cheaper the better) and would find that I had gone past the point of drunk and remained stone cold sober.  A life time of blackouts and gray outs and pissing my life away with bad choices.

In these little church basements, Veteran’s Halls, Rec Rooms and seedy old abandoned by life state offices…there is and are, pamphlets, books, coins and hoards of militant looking eclectic persons.  By day and by night and everyday of the week…a hand is out.  I received at hand in an old gymnasium on the State Hospital grounds in New Hampshire.

Norma had been the women’s name.  She had more years of sobriety than I had living on this earth.  She smiled, shook my hand, offered me a burnt but wonderful cup of coffee and led me to a chair.

Since that day my drinking has never been the same.  Being clean tends to put a damper on the edgy chaotic life we all strive for when overly fed on booze and ego.

To be a regular and a fixture in the halls is a privilege to which many Ambien and Annie Grace’s will never see.  For the bottom has been covered over by a regular visit to dishonesty.  For the rest…the twenty-something’s clinging to a hope that lived inside them on the days when Dad didn’t come home or Mom was out using?  They are an testament to true strength and belief in there being plenty excuses to use but no reasons.

 

 

Sometimes I miss that feeling of falling
Falling on over the ledge
You know I miss that feeling of falling
Falling on over the ledge
And when my mind it gets to worryin’
And I just can’t get no rest
Oh Baby, that’s when I call you up instead

It’s after midnight baby, I’m sittin’ here all alone
I tried to call your number baby,
But you weren’t at home
I been a good girl baby, through with all that mess
But the way I’m feelin’ now, darlin’
Well it scares me half to death

Well I miss that feelin’, of fallin’
On over the ledge

That summer night in Texas, baby
Too hot and wet to sleep
I heard you pull up in the distance
You’re comin’ to get me relief
We went screamin’ down the highway, baby
So much faster than we should
You pulled me over in the moonlight
Man, I still can feel that hood

Well I miss that feeling of fallin’,
On over the ledge
When that rain starts baby, I want to take a real
Good look at that ledge

It ain’t something you get over
You might think you made it through
You can turn your head and walk away
But it never takes it’s eyes off you

It’ll push your foot right through the floorboard
Make you cut them streamers down his back
You waste what’s precious and you can’t afford
It runs your life right off the track

Keeps you boilin’ in that poison
Only the truly twisted know so well
You don’t need drugs to show you heaven, baby
’cause there’s plenty clean in hell

That miss that feelin’ of fallin’
Of fallin’ on over the ledge

When the blues start callin’ I want to crawl way up close to the ledge

miss that feeling of falling

miss that feeling of falling

You Say You Want a Revolution

Posted on by Standard Respond
Start the Revolution Without Me

Start the Revolution Without Me (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The U.S. vs. John Lennon (soundtrack)

The U.S. vs. John Lennon (soundtrack) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

In the midst of social media, I have found one redeeming quality; the right to be proven wrong.
There has been a growing long distance relationship between myself and a heterosexual male from Detroit…
This meeting of the minds happened over a year ago and I am grateful for the growth it has given me everyday of my ‘not always politically correct but trying’ life.
Who doesn’t love a verbal or written spar? I have always relished in it. And, for that matter, my upbringing has called for it and embraced it. Though often I hear these words, your mouth is always getting you in trouble.’
So be it. My buddy from Detroit miles and piles of shit in between our locales, is liberal, political, substantial and disabled! What a find! With very little encouragement on my part, D, as I will call him, will find the smallest hole in an argument and take it to the highest plateau…drop it and see what it hits on it’s way down.
Today and tonight our focus is on Too Much Government! Too Many Cooks stirring the Biochemical Pot, so to speak.
Perhaps, D is right, it isn’t that there is too much government but more along the lines of too much trash talk and not enough put your money where your mouth is.
Why dwell on our Dumbed Down Ambien’s of America‘s Upper Middle Class Wasteland?
Yet, spar with intellectuals who want to see change.
In a simpler manner and/or along the lines of a story I will explain exactly what I mean:
I had met Ambien/Annie Grace who could have be easily mistaken for a Brittany or a Katelyn or a Mercedes!
I had asked, ‘so you are voting for Obama, right?’
Response, ‘Nope, my Father Floyd says he wants to ruin Medicare and offer hand outs to the poor.’
Aghast I spoke with as even a tone as I could muster, ‘but you’re gay! How could you even remotely think of voting for someone who can’t stand the ground you walk on?’

Response from Dumbed Down Twenty-Something, ‘gee, I never thought of it that way. I don’t plan on getting married any time soon, though…if that means anything’

What is right? What is wrong?
If we don’t push our educated selves into seeing beyond the glass slipper we will fail to make any change. To educate via a high education is one thing. To acquire the necessary depth it takes to make ineffectual effectual actually requires the wanting to go beyond words and to search for their meaning.
Thank you, D, you are a delight in a world ashen and paled by devices devised to make us more convenient.
Shame on you parents, colleges, workplaces and a vast array of other Holier Than Thou Institutions for sending these kids out into the world with their thumb up their ass and their diploma a flag of still waters running not so deep.

Pan Handling for America

Posted on by Standard Respond
English: Uncle Sam recruiting poster.

English: Uncle Sam recruiting poster. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Jean Loring in Identity Crisis. Art by Rags Mo...

Jean Loring in Identity Crisis. Art by Rags Morales. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

English: Downtown, Concord, New Hampshire

English: Downtown, Concord, New Hampshire (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

 

A diminutive awareness is a unsafe thing. Hmmm. Good point! So in other words, being completely obtuse is the way to go. Better to profess a complete lack of knowledge than better one’ self with information, data, poetry, books and what not.
If one were say, papered with a diploma that professes said person had actually risen to the task of adulthood. She received the B and the F and the A…however, did not internalize one sage word or one profound belief. Furthermore, it was encouraged of her to defraud the college system by refusing to give credence to a sexual assault. Later on down the line, that lack of even the tiniest awareness inbred and manifested into a rage on and about sexual deviation, porn, sex toys and violence in the bedroom.
Again, just the smallest bit of lighting at the end of an Ambien laced tunnel may have halted the assaults, perhaps, put a dent in college age binge drinking and shed some distance between raising a child in the turn of current events instead of forcing them to always look over their shoulder for events they had no control over.
Take this now ‘young adult’ pepper her with a bad work ethic, sexual harassment of her co-workers and ask her to defraud the government. I wonder what she would say?
“No, I think I should pose nude only if I’m paying taxes like everyone else!”
Nope, wrong answer…She will continue on her decadently sedated in psychotropic medications way. Her mother who holds her dear…So dear that there is a glimpse of incest without the sex. She will encourage her, only now, and after all these years, to get the Fuck Out of the House!.
With Mother Theresa‘s approval and disownment there is no choice for this childlike adult as there isn’t with many of her generation.
As she will tell you, ‘I don’t know how to live on my own!’
In walks Uncle Sam, AmeriCorps, VISTA, FEMA and out walks a glazed over version of the diminutively unaware America. She now is a paid volunteer, oxymoron! She is now on SNAP benefits. She now is fully covered medically by the U.S. government.

In return for these vast riches that many would give an arm and a child for, the Ambien Annie’s will return home with no badge of courage. They will have not attempted the slightest bit of awareness. For even a little is asking too much. They will invade my hometown, Concord New Hampshire. They will invade your hometown. They have done their duty. They will soon be the middle aged women that insist on making Pan Handling illegal due to the unsightliness of it all. They will work to free city parks and state lands of the homeless for it brings down the value of their fine town.
It all starts with one dose of learning a little wisdom which turns into absorbing a little understanding and in the end, with diminutive awareness there will be one less mistaken identity on the street.

 

Anti-Social Social Security

Posted on by Standard Respond
KBR: Kickbacks, Bribes, Ripoffs & War Racketee...

KBR: Kickbacks, Bribes, Ripoffs & War Racketeering (g1a2d0043c1) (Photo credit: watchingfrogsboil)

BANKSTER DOOMSDAY KIT ... Economic Inequality:...

BANKSTER DOOMSDAY KIT … Economic Inequality: a Small Price to Pay for Staying Human (8/23/2012, 2:54 pm) …item 3.. Spotify – The bottom line: It’s the best free music option since stealing. (July 14, 2011) … (Photo credit: marsmet451)

Paying taxes is required for both citizens and...

Paying taxes is required for both citizens and non-citizens. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

One very intelligent reader/follower/fellow blogger states:
“How can the government not do background checks on ‘these’ volunteers? The AmeriCorps? The VISTA‘? The FEMA‘s? Doesn’t seem to make sense if you say, someone is currently volunteering to help the poor and yet haven’t paid taxes for a year!”
Well, it is pretty simple and an even dumb and dumber equation when it comes to the U.S., government.
If you speak out too much about anything that seems to be amiss in regards to a statement and/or act committed by these Bimbo’s and Narcissistic Politicians that manage to buy a vote into a seat filled with grainy and misjudged ideas set about by our forefathers…if a tax paying citizen causes too much of a ruckus;
that person is considered an extremist, too far to the right, too far to the left, a liberal lumberjack with an axe to grind.
Example:
“I’m so excited. I just go that job I told you about. The one I found on Craig’s list. It seems legit and I’m getting paid $15.00 an hour under the table. If I can’t make the art…I at least can be close to it by posing nude.”
Quote unquote from our Anti-Hero, Ambien/Annie the not so full of Grace Couvillion.
I still find it strange that not only did the pay get slipped to her odd and illegal ways. But there were other adults involved that work for the New Hampshire Highed Education System and not only did they condone the behavior, they bought her a robe for when the winds of travesty changed.
I have paid taxes for 30 years…And, I am not even sure if social security wants to hang around long enough for me to collect it…say by the time I’m 90? But yeah, I have an axe to grind. And, it is called, white folks with a dime will never pay for the crime.